Modern Poems · Modern Spirit

Last Hues of Autumn

Claret sugar maple, Ginkgoes of fading gold,
Now falls tenderly the last hues of autumn,
Mischievously stirring a momentary discontent,
from the ample bosoms of the sullen years buried,
And to fright the souls again with fragmentary plights.

How I wished the pearly clouds landing beside
in victorious wreath, and garland of promises,
Fly me to the merciful sky in safe obscurity,
and deliver my every breath to the beloved,
Tell him freely all the insolence of my heart’s calamity:
Broken prophecies, filial disobedience and bruised dreams…
No longer I can bear the whips and scorns of times in secrecy.

Yet neither I can justify such honesty an outrageous fortune,
nor have I ever proven myself a kind lover in slightest hint.
But there will be a time for everyone, my friends,
Like the last hues of this benevolent autumn,
Harvested are the patient merits of life’s beautitude.

Poet’s Week Journal:

This week, dramas continued in my professional life in Philadelphia, which I rather not to elaborate at this moment. Nevertheless, I am much relieved that life is starting to slow down her pace for me a bit and allowing me to finally settling in my current residency. I am also grateful to my new community which has been giving me much needed supports.

One thing that I keep reminding myself these days is not to waste my energy on others’ senseless dramas, but to concentrate fully on my current project. Some lovely readers have asked about my studies. To make it short and understandable, I study and research ritual process and efficacy, esp in relation to temple dance (the embodiment and enactment of religion). This field has not been well-investigated before and I hope to bring some scholarly awareness to it.

Many years ago, when I expressed my interest in pursuing PhD studies in Buddhism to my family, I was serious. Yet I was considered ‘odd and mad’ and unfortunately, I let them talk me out of it. Looking back today, I am amazed by how the heart always fights her way back to honor a true self. There will be wrong turns and dead ends, there will prejudice and ignorance, but remember that we are on a divine appointment together and trust the journey wholeheartedly. The time will come! The time will come! and we’ve got to keep that faith! 💕🥳

At my new home. Picture taken by my lovely neighbor Jasmine. ( After seeing the photo, I realised that I couldn’t look more melancholic there😅😬😂…. A complete ‘ I wanna leave here’ face😅…)

23 thoughts on “Last Hues of Autumn

  1. You write such beautiful poetry, Annabel. I’m particularly fond of your last line, “Harvested are the patient merits of life’s beautitude”. Yes! Thank you for sharing, my friend. I wish you well in Philadelphia, and must say that you look quite lovely. 🤗🌹

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Oh, your beautiful words made me blush and blooming inside🥰😃, Phil! I am happy that you liked the last line and my fav line, too.

      It’s very generous of you saying the photo was lovely! (I felt myself looked like a frightened bird in my own home😬😅). Enjoy the rest of your week and send much gratitude to you!💕

      Liked by 2 people

  2. A beautiful poem, is magical, and lovely commentary. I’m so pleased to read you are letting the drama go by, for it will always be created, and for me, it is to remember to reside in the heart, and just let it go…much love to you, my dear friend. ❤️🌺🦋🥰

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you so much, Jeff! I appreciate the pop talk and feel much better how😃🥰. And yes, just let it go and ‘reside in the heart’. Very beautifully said, dear friend!🥳🙏

      Big hug to you!😃🙏

      Liked by 1 person

  3. You opened up to us and wrote a beautiful piece dear Annabel. Your line of study is unique, but not unknown to us in India, as you very well know. I wish you all success in your endeavours… but I beg to disagree on the ” I wanna leave here” look! You look like an oriental royalty 😍 Keep at it and don’t call it quits.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for your always sensible and beautiful comments, dear Sushmita! I’m delighted that you have felt my openness in my poem. It was not an easy walk to where I am now, haha.

      You’re right and Indians are so fortunate to have rich culture of temple traditions and arts!! Yet, the dance studies on Indian classical dance are mainly focus on the form, shape, and postcolonial reconstruction of the dance, not the ritual dance process and efficacy prior to British Raj. (I can talk nonstop about this stuff, haha)

      Much grateful to your encouragement and your kind comments on the ‘look’!! they went straight to my heart! send hugs to you!


    1. Thank YOU for your kindness, Sushmita❤️.

      I am always excited to have conversations with you and others from India. The Indian temple dance is one of my favorite topics 🥰😃, haha! Much gratitude to you for your support and encouragement!🥂🥳🙏

      Liked by 1 person

  4. An amazingly-written piece, and I definitely related to the realization of “…how the heart always fights her way back to honor a true self.” You are such a beautiful soul, as whispered in that portrait and in your dance. ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for your generous and beautiful words, dear Laura💕! Indeed, there’s a sense of life’s mission glowing with time, with struggles, and with healing. And Your kindness put a bright smile on me🥰

      THANK YOU!


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